Northern Ireland Outdoors Forum - Hiking, camping and more
General => General Chat => Topic started by: RedLeader on August 21, 2009
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Go on, it's Friday and I could do with a larf.
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look at, www.infoslash.net, its not as bad as it sounds more funny.
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These two nuns are driving through transylvannia and a vampire attacks the car....the nuns panic and one says to the other " Quick Bernadette...show it your cross".........Bernadette rolls down the window and shouts "f*ck aff ye auld b**tard ye".....
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New Standard Operating Procedures released today. Please learn.
BBQ RULES We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity. When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
Routine...
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables
and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three metre exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.
Here comes the important part:
(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine...
(6) The woman goes inside to organise the plates and cutlery.
(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat.
Important again:
(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
More routine...
(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauce and brings them to the table.
(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts
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Did anyone look at www.infoslash.net ??